ONLY AT NIGHT only at night can I really see the world I live in and how far into it I have fallen each star a nod in my direction across a room not infinite but so large it might as well be a nod I cannot feel really acknowledges me but is simply given to a memory of those other stars nearby at its birth and now long since hollowed to nothing by their fires a nod given to no one it is dawn that blinds me to this large world both immensely heavy and atomically light sunrise that blocks the horizon over which I peered in that early hour that held my first wakefulness the anonymizing brilliance that closes me into a world I cannot leave and assembles a sky to cover me as if uncovered I would have a vision too large to find myself within